Monday, April 19, 2010

today's installment of "life with boys"...

... the tender fruit of my womb sheepishly asks me if he can have a snake for pet. Here is the conversation that followed:

The Boy: Can I have a pet snake?
Me: No, I don't think you're old enough for the responsibility.
The Boy: But what if I found it and it didn't cost you anything?
Me: That is not the issue.
The Boy: Are you afraid of snakes?
Me: No.
The Boy: Good. Because I lost my pet snake.
Me: You don't have a pet... wait. What?
The Boy: I was hiding it under my bed.
Me: [through clenched teeth] You mean to say there is a snake loose in the house?
The Boy: It's OK really! I think the cat will eat it.

Oh joy. The only thing better than finding a live snake in your home is finding the mauled mutilated corpse of a snake in your home.



If you can identify the picture you may be a tree humping hippy.

16 comments:

Angela M. said...

Terry Nelson?!

The Crescat said...

Ha HA HA ... you don't know how close you are.

Karen said...

Once again, I'll be thanking God that I have girls.

PaxetBonum said...

Boys will be boys.

Foto looks like the young JFK, before the White House and even before he met Jackie. Maybe his liberal parish liturgists in Hyannis Port were experimenting (well before Vatican II, mind you) with integrating snakes into their "liturgies", as an ecumenical nod to our separated evangelical brethren. Instead of shaking ten stranger's sweaty paws at the Sign Of Peace, pull out a big old snake and pass it around to your astonished neighbors. Nothing says "peace be with you" like handing your fellow pewsitters a nice slithery pit viper.

Is a "tree humping hippy" like a "tree hugging hippy", but with a greatly enhanced libido? Just wondering.

gretchen said...

"Nothing says "peace be with you" like handing your fellow pewsitters a nice slithery pit viper."

ROFLMAO!

3puddytats said...

Growing up we had a yellow tomcat that my mom disliked..he tried on many an occasion to make peace by bringing into the house live rattlesnakes that he so painstakingly captured without killing them..so that my horrified mom could do the honors...my dad made a hatband out of one of them...

Sara

Shark Bait said...

It's a very young Gaylord Nelson.

And for the record, the tree and I are jsut friends.

(So what do I win?)

Rose said...

This makes me very glad, on behalf of my sister as the mother of two boys, that there are no snakes in Ireland because if there were, dang straight there would be pet snakes under beds :-)

The Crescat said...

P & B ... classic.
"Is a "tree humping hippy" like a "tree hugging hippy", but with a greatly enhanced libido? Just wondering."

Shark Bait... friends w benefits maybe. Yes you are correct. That is a picture of Gaylord Nelson, founder of Earth Day.

PaxetBonum said...

Well, that explains it. Clueless parents name their innocent newborn manchild "Gaylord", kid endures endless teasing and gratuitous cruelty from his peers, grows up tough and mean, pissed off at the whole world, and gets even by inflicting "Earth Day" on all of humanity. Figures.

May as well have named him "Sue". Stupid hippies.

Ink said...

Thank you, God, for sisters. Even though I'm ready to put them up for sale.

They're cute... any takers?

Dymphna said...

Even back then naming your son Gaylord was a cruel, cruel thing.

thedivinelamp said...

The only thing better than finding a live snake in your home is finding the mauled mutilated corpse of a snake in your home.

You sound like my mom and the Sisquatch*. Have you ever stopped to consider that the snake might win? He's the one I'll be rootin' for.

*Sisquatch~A foul smelling, hairy-knuckled beast, commonly misidentified as belonging to the hominid species termed "Older Sister."

The Ironic Catholic said...

uh...so was the snake found?

nazareth priest said...

I just hope the damned thing wasn't poisonous...
Yikes!
You are much more phlegmatic about this than I would have been; and I'm a man...(although where snakes are concerned, I can be a little girl:<)!)hate snakes! Hate 'em!

kired said...

maybe the boy belongs to House Slytherin