Monday, August 09, 2010

on faith...

... Jesus, I trust in You.

Every morning I am greeted by those words hanging on my bedroom wall in the image of the Divine Mercy. And every morning I say them to myself determined to make myself believe it.

But I wonder. Lately I haven't been behaving like a women with total trust in the Lord. I have been plowing forward with typical take charge of the situation exuberance. Determined and driven. After all, I grew up being fed the unrealistic B.S. that I could do whatever I want as long as I put my mind to it.

The Lord is still trying to beat this out me. It is taking me an unusually long amount of time for it to sink in that the more I try to control various situations in my life the worse those situations become. I just can't find the balance between the resourcefulness of helping myself achieve goals and knowing when to quit so God can take control.

It's a sick internal battle of bull headedness and faith.


Terry Nelson said...

I wonder if it ever ends - I'm still struggling.

Babs said...

Trust is a process - not a place that we can necessarily get to -- at least that is my experience. It is an everyday task. Saying the words, "Jesus, I trust you," is important because as you read it, say it, and hear it, you are using three senses to remember or reinforce where you want to be moving toward.

The longer I live, and the more I recognize how much I have messed up by going my own way, the more I'm able to say, "Yes, Lord, I trust you." That doesn't mean that I don't have to keep on renewing that trust, or that there aren't areas of my life where I still lack trust in God's mercy and goodness. But I look back at all the amazing ways God has answered my needs - expressed and not -- and I have a firmer grounding in trust than previously.

Oh, and God certainly isn't going to beat anything out of you.

Dan said...

Nobody says that you can't trust that Our Lord made you determined and bull-headed. Either way, it's still trust.

Be thankful for those areas of oneself that are imperfect. These areas keep one humble!

Old Bob said...

Growing in trust, faith, and love is a lifelong process; I'm 66 and still climbing those stairs. Hang in there, Kat; and as (I'm sure) St. Francis de Sales said, be kind to yourself.

3puddytats said...

We can use the words of the "belief" prayer..

Jesus--I Trust in You...

Please help me in my lack of trust...

I thin I'll put that on my mirror..I sure could use it too..


newguy40 said...

Well... trust is one thing. Surrendering to God's will and plan for you is something else again. At least it has been for me.

Same issue for me. If God would ONLY answer my prayers the WAY I want, then everything will be fine. Right?

I have to remember to add to my prayers that "....if this is what God is asking of me... then that is what I want, too..." Not my will but Yours.

It's a constant struggle for me. Is it Pride? Lack of humility?

I have started saying simple prayers through out the day to keep me focused on Jesus as you show with your Divine Mercy.